| Everything on this page is copyright © 1999 by Faruk
Ates. All rights reserved. That means: please don't take my work without asking! Revised: 07 mei 1999. |
 |
******* To bee or not to bee! *******
We find Cloud, Cid, Vincent, Yuffie, Tifa and Elena walking in Midgar at
evening.
Cloud: Hey, look at that!
Cid: What?
Cloud: That, an old barrel!
Cid: (sarcastic) Wow dude, thats cool!
Cloud: Shut up, i like barrels.
Yuffie: What's so fun about barrels?!
Cloud: Well, not much, but i always hope to find some cool stuff in them.
Vincent: Like?
Cloud: I don't know, treasure maybe.
Cid: Ha! Treasure my @$$, nobody will leave anything valuable in a BARREL!
Cloud: Well, let's just take a look.
Tifa: (who was talking with Elena the whole time) Take a look at what?
Vincent: Cloud thinks there could be treasure in that old barrel...
Elena: (grinning) Treasure???
Tifa: (also grinning) As in, GOLD?!?!?!
Elena: No, rubies ofcourse!
Tifa: No wait, i got it! PAPER!!! (both Tifa and Elena start laughing)
Cloud: Haha, very funny. Let's see what's in here...(lifts the lid from the barrel and
looks in)
Cid: Well???
Cloud: Hmm, it's pretty dark in here....OUCH!! (falls backwards)
Cid: Huh?
(Tifa and Elena start laughing even louder!)
Vincent: ....
Cloud: Something stung me!
Cid: What??
Cloud: I dunno, look for yourself!
Cid: So it can sting me too? Forget it!
Vincent: ....
Yuffie: What is it Vincent?
Vincent: Well, i was just thinking: Should I shoot the barrel, or set fire to it?
Cloud: Wait dude, let's not rush into anything!
Cid: Yeah, i wanna know what stung Cloud, so i can thank it!
Cloud: Shut up!
Vincent: Well, what are we going to do then?
Cloud: (rubbing his nose) Hmm, i'll take another careful look.
Cid: Ok, look out though!
Tifa: (still laughing) Yeah, look out...(rolls on the ground)
Yuffie: I can't see what's so funny!
Vincent: They're just having a corny mood.
Yuffie: A what?
Vincent: Never mind
Tifa: So what?
Elena: Yeah, so whahahaa....
Vincent: Do you see it now....?
Yuffie: Hmm.
Cloud: Im gonna take another look again!
(looks carefully in the barrel)
Cid: Well???
Cloud: I still can't see much. Gimme some light or something.
Vincent: Here. (takes a flashlight out of his cape)
Cid: You have a flashlight with you?
Vincent: Yes. So?
Cid: Never mind.
Cloud: WOW! LOOKIE HERE GUYS!
Cid/Vincent: What??? (they take a look in the barrel too)
Cloud: Cool huh!
Vincent: (sees a gagged man with a weird face and a very pointy nose) It's...weird...
Cid: Is that all you can say???
Vincent: ...AND interesting....
Cid: Ok.
Cloud: I think he stung me with his nose!
Man: Bzzbzbzzbzzbzz!
Everyone: ????
Man: Bzzbzbzzbzbbbzzzz!
Cid: Hmm, i think it's because of the gag that we can't understand him.
Vincent: Hmm, I agree.
Cloud: Me too.
Yuffie: ???? And you guys don't even take it off, you just think it's the gag???!!!
Cloud: Um, yeah!
Yuffie: You are such @$$holes! (takes the man's gag out)
Cid: Now, say that again please...
Man: BZZZBZZBBZZZBZBZZZ!!!!!!!
Everyone: WHAT???????
Tifa: (who finally stopped her laughing) Huh? What's wrong with him?
Cloud: He's WEIRD!!!
Vincent: I think he has a malfunctioning mouth, due to the frost of last night, which made
his....
Cid: Ah SHUT UP! Don't talk nonsense!
Vincent: ...lips freeze to eachother and now he has two frozen lips!
Cloud: Now that's the stupidest thing i ever heard!
Vincent: Well i don't hear you suggesting what could be wrong with him!
Cloud: Well at least I don't go babbling stupid stuff!
Cid: Well, let's check him out first! (searches the man)
Man: BZZBZZBZZZZBZZBZZZZZZBZZZ!!!!!
Cid: Don't worry, i'm only looking if you have an ID on you!
Man: BZZZ!
Cid: Ok i will.
Man: BZZBZBZZZ???
Cid: No thanks, it'll be fine.
Man: BZBZBZBZBZZBZZZBZ!!!
Cid: Hey, don't get wild! I told you, i'm just looking for an ID!!!
Man: BZBZZZ!
Cid: What's that? In your left pocket??? (checks his left pocket)
Man: BZZBZZZBZBZZBZBZBZZ!!!
Cid: Oh sorry, pictures of your secret lover!
Man: BZZBZZ!?
Everyone: (who have been watching this all happen) Cid?????
Cid: What?
Vincent: You understand him????
Cid: No, i'm just fooling you all! Ha!
Everyone: Doh.
Cid: Well, he hasn't got any ID on him, so let's take him home.
(they take the man to 7th heaven, to try and find out who he is)
Barret: Whos he?? Wuz wrong wit'his nose?
Vincent: He's like a bee, he can only say BZZZ!
Barret: A beezz, i mean, bee???
Cid: Yup.
Cloud: Well, let's try to get more out of him ok?
Cid: How?
Cloud: Um, ask him????
Vincent: Go ahead.
Cloud: Ok, (to the man) what's your name and where do you come from?
Man: Bzzbzzbzzzz, bzzb bbzzz bzzzz!
Yuffie: That helped us very much Cloud!
Cloud: Why doncha just shut up!
Man: (pointing at a map on the wall) BZZBZZZZBZZZ!
Cid: Ofcourse, the map! Tifa get that map will'ya.
Tifa: Ok. (takes the map of the wall) Here ya go Cid.
Cid: Now, (to the man) where are you from?
Man: (pointing at Midgar) BZZ!
Vincent: Um....useful!
Cid: Shut up, apparently he doesn't know he's in Midgar already!
Cloud: Tifa, get a map of Midgar.
Tifa: Yes SIR!! (thinks) Tifa do this, Tifa do tha! When did i become the maid around
here??
Barret: Whadduya up to Cloud?
Cloud: Maybe he can point which sector he's from!
Cid: Ofcourse, i was just gonna say that too!
Vincent: No you weren't!
Cid: Shut up vampy!
Vincent: I'm not a vampire!
Cid: Then howd'ya know i wasn't gonna say that huh?
Vincent: Instinct!
Cid: Sure, VAMPY!
Vincent: Grrr!
Tifa: (comes back with a map of Midgar) Here Cloud!
Cloud: Thanks Tifa.
Tifa: (thinks) Well, at least HE thanked me for it.
Cloud: (speaking slowly to the man) Where.......are........you.....from.....???
Vincent: Cloud, he is not deaf, he can't read lips and he can understand us perfectly, so
stop acting so weird!
Cloud: Shut up!
Man: (points at the Shin-Ra building) BZZ!
Everyone: ....
Man: BZZZ??
Tifa: You're from Shin-Ra ????
Man: (nodding his head) BZZZZ!!!
Cloud: Did Hojo do this to you???
Man: (nods again) BZZZ!
Barret: DAMN! I hates him!
Cloud: Well, let's get some rest and go to the Shinra building tomorrow ok?
Everyone: Ok.
Man: BZZ!
Cid: Goodnight little fella.
Man: BZ!
(they go to their beds, while the man sleeps in the kitchen on the ground)
The next morning...
Tifa: Wake up guys, we got things to find out!
(Everyone except for Cloud comes out of their rooms and goes down)
Tifa: Could anyone wake Cloud, i think he's still sleeping!
Cid: I will.
Tifa: I'll check on our guy.
Cid: (from upstairs) HEY!!!!
Tifa: (from the kitchen) HEY!!!
(Cid and Tifa run back to the others in the main room)
Tifa/Cid: (at the same time) HE'S GONE !!!!!!!
Vincent: Calm down...now who is missing?
Tifa/Cid: (at the same time again) Cloud/our man!
Vincent: ....
Yuffie: ? Don't you have anything to say to that?
Vincent: ....
Yuffie: Ok, so apparently you don't!
Vincent: I was just thinking of some words, but i kept myself from saying them.
Cid: Now what?
Tifa: Yeah?
Vincent: Let's go to the Shin-Ra building, i have a feeling they might be there!
Cid: Ok. (they go to....well, you know where!)
Vincent, Cid and Tifa are at the Shin-Ra building 1st floor, trying to find Cloud.
Cid: Now what do we do?
Vincent: Let's ask at the information desk ok?
Tifa: I'll do that, cause you guys can't be polite enough!
Cid: What?
Vincent: That doesn't make sense!
Tifa: I don't care if it makes sense, im goin to ask it ALONE!
Cid: Oh well, go ahead!
Tifa: (to woman behind desk) Hi, i'm looking for my friend Cloud and a man with a pointy
nose.
Woman: Hmm, let me check the computer.(checks on the computer)
Tifa: Well?
Woman: No, we don't have any "Cloud" working for us, sorry.
Tifa: Huh? No, he doesn't work for you, but he should be in this building!
Woman: Well, i can't help you then. Goodbye!
Tifa: But...
Woman: Now please go, or i'll call security!
Tifa: Why you arrogant little bitch!! I'll....
Woman: SECURITY!!!!
Tifa: (smacks her) I'll teach you, you bitch!
Cid: (to Vincent) Hey look, Tifa's in trouble!
Vincent: Let's help her! (they take Tifa away before security comes)
Tifa: Let me go, i'll smash her...
Cid: TIFA!!! What happened to you?
Tifa: I don't know.
Cid: Well, maybe WE should go next time, cause you weren't very polite to her!
Tifa: Ooh, forget it. We'll never find Cloud if he's in this building!
Cid: Ofcourse we will, we'll just sneak to Hojo's Lab!
Vincent: Hmm, i think we'd better go right now, cause the security is coming, and they're
still mad at Tifa!
Tifa: Quickly, into the elevator! (they run to the elevator and hop in, just in time!)
Cid: That was a close one!
Tifa: You can say that again!
Cid/Vincent: (grinning) That again!
Tifa: What???
Vincent: Never mind! (they reach the 60th floor)
Cid: Well, let's steal a keycard!
Vincent: No need for that, i'll just blast the door! (takes his gun and blasts the door
with a great noise!)
Cid: No wait....DAMN!! Now we're busted!
Tifa: Quickly, let's go upstairs before we're noticed! (they run upstairs)
Cid: Again, a close one!
Vincent: What's the fuss abourt, we can take them on!
Tifa: Not ALL of them!!!
Vincent: Well, i don't mind a fair fight!
Cid: Vincent...
Vincent: What?
Cid: ...SHUT UP!!
Vincent: (mumbles) beep you, ya'old drunken pilot!
Cid: Let's just continue! (they keep blasting doors all the way up to Hojo's lab)
Vincent: I told you blasting was more fun!
Cid: We only blasted them because there was no other way!
Vincent: So...?
Cid: Never mind, hey look, his specimens!
Tifa: Eew, they're gross!!
Vincent: Well, i don't mind looking at them!
Cid: That's because you're a vampire.
Vincent: Im not a vampire!!! AND STOP SAYING THAT !!!!
Cid: Ok i won't.....VAMPY!!!
Vincent: Hey....!
Cid: What? I didn't say VAMPIRE !!! i said VAMPY!!!!
Vincent: Grr....
Tifa: Could you guys stop arguing and help me find Cloud!
Cid: Sure. (they look for Cloud)
Vincent: (after a while) Wait, i hear something!
Cid: What????
Tifa: Is it Cloud?
Vincent: No, it's......THE SECURITY !!!!!
Cid: Oh shi...
Tifa: Darn, we'll have to fight them! (they start a bloody fight)
Vincent: (fighting) This really makes me irritated....(turns into Chaos) *ROAR*
Security guys: Oh shit.....(they run away)
Vincent: (turning normal) See, i told you we could take them!
Tifa: Yeah, but we're all badly wounded!!!
Vincent: Don't pay attention to the details will'ya?
Cid: Shut....u..p.... (falls on the ground)
Tifa: Man, he's as good as dead!
Vincent: He never really looked alive so what?
Cid: (gaining new strength) I heard that!
Vincent: So???
Cid: I'll kill....(falls again)
Vincent: Oh well, let's just go home! (they go home) [DOH!]
Back at 7th Heaven, they find Cloud with all the others!
Cloud: Hi guys, where've you been?
Cid: What are you doing here????
Tifa: Yeah, we thought you were kidnapped or something.
Cloud: Why? I only took a little morningwalk and bought some groceries!
Vincent: What? So there's nothing wrong with you????
Cloud: Nope, im perfectly fine! But you guys seem pretty beat up!
Cid: We um, we kinda got into some fights!
Barret: Wuz you fightin' Shinra men?
Cid: Yes, but...
Barret: Good!
Cid: Oh well, we're still alive!
Tifa: Hey, but what happened to our man????
Cid: Oh yeah, where is he???
Cloud: What, you don't know yet???
Vincent: Know what???
Red: That man, was Bugenhagen!
Cid/Tifa/Vincent: WHAT?????!!!!!
Cloud: We pulled a trick on you! Hahaa!!
Cid: So the barrel and other stuff was all acted???
Cloud: Yup! (Bugenhagen comes in)
Bugenhagen: Pretty good acting too, if i do say so myself!
Red: Hi gramps.
Bugenhagen: Hi Nanaki, how are you?
Red: I'm fine, how are you?
Cid: Stop it!!!! You just pulled our legs and now you pretend it was nothing!! GRRR!!!!
Vincent: I don't like that!
Tifa: Yeah, i was worried sick about you!!
Cloud: Why? You love me???
Tifa: (walks up to Cloud) I'll show you how much i love you! (smacks him hard in the face)
Cloud: OUCH!!!
Tifa: You deserved that!
Cid: Well done Tifa!
Cloud: Shut up you jerk!
Cid: Now why did you say that??
Cloud: No reason, i just like to call you a jerk, jerk!
Cid: Ok, that's it! (attacks Cloud)
Cloud: (fights back) Jerk!!!
Cid: Grrr, i'll kill'ya!
Tifa: GUYS!!!!
Cloud/Cid: Sorry.....
Tifa: Good, now let's go to bed ok?
Cid: Ok. (whispers to Cloud) Sissy!
Cloud: (whispers to Cid) Jerk!
Tifa: Oohhhh....when will it stop?!
Vincent: Never!
Cloud/Cid: Shut up vampy!
Vincent: Grrrrrr!!!!
To bee, or not to bee continued.
Nah, The End!
Written by Faruk KuraFire Ates!